The Dragon Kingdom of Vaal Hakia is a gargantuan, orderly nation, ruled by King Cristian with an iron fist, and notable for its free-roaming dinosaurs, otherworldly petting zoo, and sprawling nuclear power plants. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless, devout population of 12.187 billion Dacians are ruled without fear or favor by a psychotic dictator, who outlaws just about everything and refers to the populace as "my little playthings."

The large, corrupt, moralistic, well-organized government is primarily concerned with Defense, although Education, Healthcare, and Law & Order are also considered important, while Social Policy and International Aid aren't funded at all. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Sarmi'Sege'Tuza'. The average income tax rate is 94.9%.

The frighteningly efficient Vaal Hakian economy, worth a remarkable 3,565 trillion Gold Koson Coins a year, is mostly comprised of black market activity, especially in Arms Manufacturing, Information Technology, and Trout Farming. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an amazing 292,545 Gold Koson Coins, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 4.1 times as much as the poorest.

The nation is committed to nuclear rearmament, truancy officers have a hard time catching children trained in advanced camouflage skills, King Cristian often plays real life games of Tower Defense against hordes of angry villagers, and military doctrine says not to open fire until you see the "beady little eyes" of Johnny Foreigner. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Vaal Hakia's national animal is the Dragon, which soars majestically through the nation's famously clear skies, and its national religion is Zamolxianism.

Vaal Hakia is ranked 29,481^st in the world and 1,461^st in Lazarus for Most Valuable International Artwork, with zero Bank.